The manuscript of Charles Dickens crazy
Yes ..! A madman! How overwhelmed my heart that word in years! I have awakened the terror that used to befall times, sending the blood hissing and tingling through my veins, until the cold dew of fear appeared in large drops on my skin and knees knocked together by the horror! And yet, now I like it. It's a beautiful name. Show me the monarch whose angry frown was ever feared more than the brightness of the eyes of a madman ... rope and hatchets of which half were safe to squeeze one fool. Ja, ja! It's great to be crazy! Be seen as a wild lion through the iron bars ... gnashing teeth and wailing in the night long and quiet, with the joyful sound of a chain, heavy ... and roll and twist the straw so brave ecstatic music. A Hurrah for the madhouse! Oh, it's a great place!
I remember the time I was afraid to be mad when I used to wake up startled, dropping to his knees and prayed that I forgive the curse of my race, when he fled precipitately at the sight of joy or happiness, to hide somewhere alone and spend hours watching the weary progress of the fever that consume my brain. I knew that madness was mixed with my blood and marrow of my bones. Who had spent a generation without the pestilence appeared and I was the first who revived. I knew I had to be: that this had always been, and so would be, and when I cowered in any dark corner of a crowded room and saw men whispering, pointing and turning their eyes towards me, I knew they were talking to each of the doomed madman, and I fled to stultify in solitude.
I did for years was a time long, long. Here the nights are long at times ... very long, but they are nothing compared to restless nights and terrifying dreams he suffered in that time. Just remember me cold. In the corners of the room remained squatting large, dark forms of insidious and mocking faces, then bent over my bed at night, tempting me to madness. Low whispers told me that the floor of the old house where he died My father's father was stained by his blood, he himself had provoked his angry madness. I covered his ears with his fingers, but screaming inside my head until the room echoed with the screams they said that a generation before the madness he was asleep, but that his grandfather had lived for years with folded hands to the ground by shackles to prevent shattered himself with them. I knew that told the truth ... well you know. He had discovered years earlier, but had tried to hide it. Ja, ja! It was too clever for them, although I consider as a madman.
madness finally came and I marveled that could ever be afraid. Now I could enter the world and laugh and shout with the best of them. I knew he was crazy, but they do not even suspected. I used to pat myself with pleasure at the thought of how well they were cheating after all what I had said and how I had looked askance when I was not crazy and he was only afraid he might go crazy someday! And how I used to laugh at pleasure, when he was alone, thinking how well I kept my secret and how quickly my kind friends would have me away from knowing the truth. Would have screamed in ecstasy while dining alone with a thundering good friend thinking how pale he would be placed, and how fast you run away, knowing that our dear friend who sat near him, sharpening a bright, shiny knife, was a madman with all the capacity , and half of the will, to sink into his heart. Oh, it was a happy life!
riches were mine, wealth poured upon me and noise among a thousand pleasures multiplied by the consciousness of my well kept secret. Inherited wealth. The law, the law itself eagle eye had been deceived, and was delivered into the hands of a madman discussed thousands of pounds. Where was the wit of men of sound mind ready? Where the ability of lawyers, eager to discover a bug? The madman's cunning had surpassed all.
had money. How I was courted! I was spending lavishly. How I praise! How humiliating to me these three brothers proud and despotic! And the white-haired old father, what deference, what respect, what a devoted friend, how I worshiped! The old man had a daughter and a sister men, and five were poor. I was rich, and when I married the girl I saw a smile of triumph on the faces of her needy relatives, they thought their plan had worked well and had won the prize. A smile touched me. Smile! Laugh laugh to clean, tear my hair and twirling across the floor with cries of joy. Very little realized that she had been married to a madman.
But wait. Had I known, "they have saved? Sister's happiness against her husband's gold. The lightest feather tossed in the air against the gay chain that adorned my body! But on one thing, despite all my cleverness, I was deceived. If he was not crazy, because even though we have enough good wit crazy sometimes get confused, the girl would have known that before would have preferred the stiff and cold placed in a heavy coffin lead to come dressed as a bride to my rich and dazzling house. Would have known that his heart belonged to a dark-eyed boy whose name I heard him utter a sigh at one time between their troubled dreams, and I had been sacrificed to alleviate the poverty of the white-haired old man and his arrogant brothers.
Now I do not remember forms or faces, but I know she was beautiful. I know I was, because in the moonlit nights when I wake up startled in my sleep and all is quiet around me, I see, standing motionless in one corner of this cell, a slight and wasted figure with long hair blacks that fall down his face, shaken by a wind is not of this earth, and eyes that fix their gaze on mine and never blink or close. Silence! My blood freezes in the heart as I write this ... that body is hers, the face is very pale and the eyes have a glassy sheen, but I know them well. The figure never moves, never gestures or talk like the others that fill this place sometimes, but for me is much more terrible, worse even than the spirits that tempted me many years ago ... Has come fresh from the grave, so it is really deadly.
For almost a year I saw that face was becoming more and more pale for nearly a year, I saw tears falling mourners down her cheeks, and never knew the cause. However, he finally discovered it. I could not help me long to find out. She never wanted me, for my part, I never thought I would do: she despised my wealth, and hated the splendor in which he lived, but I had not expected that. She loved another and I never thought I never thought such a thing. A strange feeling overwhelmed me and turned and turned in my brain thought that seemed taxes for some strange and secret power. Do not hate him, though he hated the boy for crying. I felt pity, yes, pity the unhappy life that had condemned her relatives cold and selfish. I knew she could not live long, but the thought of that before his death might engender a child of doom, which would transmit to their descendants madness, I decided. Decided to kill her.
For several weeks I thought about the poison, and then drowning, and fire. It was a beautiful view of the great house on fire, and the wife of crazy becoming ashes. I also thought the mockery of a great reward, and any sane man hanging and waved by the wind for an act he did not commit ... And all the cunning of a madman! I often thought about it, but finally gave up. Ay! Pleasure sharpening the knife day after day, feeling the sharp edge and thinking about opening that could cause a stroke of his thin, bright edge!
Finally, the old spirits that had previously been with me so often I whispered in his ear that the time had come and put the open knife in my hand. I held her firmly, rising gently from the bed and leaned over my wife, who lay asleep. His face buried in his hands. The gently pulled away and fell carelessly over his chest. He had been crying, because the traces of tears still wet on his cheeks. His face was calm and placid, and as I looked, a quiet smile lit up her pale features. I put my hand gently on the shoulder. She started ... had been only a passing dream. I leaned forward again and she screamed and awoke.
A single movement of my hand and never have returned to give a shout or sound. But I got scared and backed away. His eyes were fixed on mine. I do not know why, but I chickened out and frightened, and moaned to them. He stood, still looking at me intently. I was shaking, had a knife in his hand, but could not move. She headed for the door. When I was close, she turned and looked away from my face. The spell is undone. I jumped forward and held her by the arm. A cry after another, fell to the ground.
could have killed her without a fight, but had caused alarm in the house. I heard footsteps on the stairs. I left the knife in the drawer usual, I opened the door and cried aloud for help.
came, was caught and placed in bed. He remained with the knowledge lost for several hours, and when he regained life, look and speech, had lost consciousness and rave furiously.
call several doctors, important men who came to my house in fine carriages, with fine horses and gaudy servants. Were at his bedside during weeks. Held an important meeting and consulted with each other softly and solemnly, in another room. One of them, the most intelligent and famous, he took me aside and asked me to prepare me for the worst. My wife told me I was crazy ... To me, the fool! He stood near me with an open window, looking straight at his face and left hand on my shoulder. With a little effort could have been throwing down the street. It would be fun to do, but my secret was at stake and let him go. A few days later I was told to submit to certain limitations: it should provide someone to care for her. What I calling to me! I went to the open field where nobody could hear me, and laughed till the air resounded with my shouts!
died the next day. The white-haired old man followed her to the tomb and the proud brothers dropped a tear over the insensible corpse of her whose sufferings they had regarded with iron muscles of his days. All this fed my secret joy, and laughed hidden by the white handkerchief over his face while he was riding back home, until the tears welled up in my eyes.
But although he had accomplished my goal, and was killed, I felt restless and disturbed, and I would not take much to know my secret. I could not hide the joy and exhilaration wild and boiling inside me when I was alone at home, I was jumping and clapping, round and round in a frenzied dance, and shout loudly. When I went out and saw the busy bodies who hurried down the street, or went to the theater and heard the sound of music and watched the others dance, I felt such joy that I would have rushed among them and would have torn limb from limb , howling in ecstasy that I produce. But gritted teeth, said foot on the floor and dug his sharp fingernails. Kept secret and nobody knew I was still mad.
remember, although it is one of the last thing I can remember, now is mixed reality with my dreams, and having so much to do, having always brought here so hastily, I have no time to separate between the two, by strange confusion in which they are mixed ... I remember how it finally became clear. Ja, ja! I think I see now its look scared, and feel how it departed from me as I plunged my fist into their white faces and then escaped as the wind, and left them screaming back. When I think about it makes me a giant force. See how they curve this iron bar with my angry jerk. Could break like a twig, but I know there are long galleries behind many doors, do not think I could find the way between them, and even if I could, I know down there are iron gates are securely locked with bars. They know I've been a crazy smart, and are proud to have me here to show me.
Now, yes, had been discovered. It was late and dark when I got home and found there the proudest of the three proud brothers waiting to see me ... said that an urgent matter. I remember it well. I hated that man with all the hatred of a madman. Many times my fingers wanted cutting it. I was told it was there and went hurriedly downstairs. Had to say a few words. I dismissed the servants. It was late and we were alone together ... for the first time.
At first he carefully drew my eyes off him, he was conscious of what he could not even think, and I gloried in that knowledge, that the light of madness in my eyes shone like fire. We stayed a few minutes sitting in silence. Finally he spoke. My current dissipation, and some strange comments made shortly after the death of his sister, were an insult to the memory of it. Joining many other circumstances that it had at first escaped his observation, had come to think that I had not been treated well. He wanted to know if he was right in saying that I was going to do a reproach to the memory of his sister, thereby failing to respect for family. The explanation required by the uniform he wore.
man had an appointment in the army ... An appointment with my money and bought the disgrace of his sister! He was the most cunning and had planned to stay with my wealth. He had been the main instrument to force his sister to marry me, and knew that the heart of it belonged to the pious boy. Because of their uniform! The uniform of his degradation! I turned my eyes towards him ... I could not help, but did not say a word.
under my eyes I saw that it was a sudden change. It was a brave man, but the color drained from his face and back in his chair. I pulled mine to hers, and while laughing, then I was very happy because I saw how to shudder. I know the madness pouring from me. I was scared of myself.
"I wanted you lot to your sister when she was alive," he said. A lot.
looked uneasily around, and saw him holding his hand over the back of the chair, but said nothing.
"You're a villain," he said. I discovered. I discovered your hellish traps against me that her heart was set on another when you forced her to marry me. I know ... I know.
Suddenly, he jumped from his chair and swung up, forcing me to go back, because as he tried to get closer to talking about it.
Rather than talk about cried, because I felt tumultuous passions were running through my veins, and the old spirits whispering and tempted me to take out her heart.
-Condemned "I said putting it up and throwing me over him. I killed her. I'm crazy. I'll finish with you. Blood, blood! I have to have it!
I stepped aside to avoid a coup that, in their terror, I threw the chair, and I enzarcé with him. Producing a strong noise, we fell together on the floor and rolled over him.
was a good fight, he was a tall, strong man fighting for his life, and I'm a crazy powerful thirst for destruction. There was no force equal to mine, and I was right. Yes, the reason, even a fool! Each time was struggling less. I knelt on his chest and held it firmly with both hands dark throat. His face was turning purple and his eyes popped out of his head and his tongue hanging out seemed to mock me. Squeezed further.
Suddenly the door opened with a loud bang and went into a group of people, shouting to each other that cogieran the madman.
My secret was out and now only fighting for my freedom. I stood before a hand touched me, I jumped between the assailants and made my way with my strong arm, as if he had an ax in his hand and attacked her. I reached the door, I jumped over the banister and in an instant was in the street.
I ran fast and straight, no one dared to stop. From behind I heard the sound of feet, and redoubled speed. It grew weaker in the distance, until finally disappeared completely, but I kept jumping in the swamps and creeks, over fences and walls, with wild cries they heard strange beings coming toward me everywhere and the sound increased until it pierced the air . Was carried in the arms of demons who ran on the wind, which pierced the edges and hedges, and circled and circled around me with a noise and speed that made me lose my head, until I finally got away from them with a bang and fell heavily to the ground. Upon waking, I found here in this gray cell which rarely reaches sunlight, and by passing the moon rays only serve to show dark shadows around me, and so you can see the silent figure in the corner. When awake, I can sometimes hear strange cries from distant parts of this huge place. I do not know what they are, but not from that body pale, and she also ignored. For from the first shades of dusk till the first light of morning, that figure still stands motionless in the same place, listening to the music of my iron chain, and seeing me jump on my bed of straw. End
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